i failed my chinese msa. i cant believe it. i never fail chinese. NEVER. i seriously can't believe this. this is like, i dont know, i feel like i'm stuck in the valley of depression now. and i really hate zombie. ARGH. i wish you could just shut up. maybe one day when i really go crazy i might just take a needle and thread and sew up her mouth. then she'll call the police and i'll be sent to the mental hospital and i'll have this room to myself where i'll have to wear that weird shirt with the super long sleeves that is tied together. sometimes i think i give myself too much stress. sometimes i think i slack too much and in my mind i'll start to scold myself. i think i might really be going mad. i think i'm really going to fail all my msas. i hate being stuck here. i need to get out. away from zombie and crazy B and selfish B. i'm such a spoilt brat. i need sweet stuff now. now. now. all these things in my mind are driving me crazy. i think i'm thinking too much about stuffs. i dont get econs and maths. teachers are going too fast. i'm sleeping too late. can't concentrate. i'm so dead. i'm spending money like nobody's business. actually it is nobody's business. i think my period is coming. that will explain the crazy moodswings. now i just feel like sitting in a dark corner and stare into space and maybe even cry if the moodswing is that bad. or maybe i'm just going mad. i realise that after saying the whole story out to those 4 people, i have sort of make it real and then now i'm kind of resisting it and somehow i am pretty sad but i hate that i'm getting sad over this. does it even make sense? i hate myself. DEAR CHENTING:I'm sorry, I don't hate you.LOVE, CHENTING.and to -, thanks for offering to buy me ice cream even though its like 10+ already:)
Monday, March 22
